Rules? I don't think so...

I have a friend who vehemently disagrees with reading instruction manuals. I was helping her set up her apartment one day, which necesarily included some do-it-yourself furniture from IKEA, and there I came to appreciate the value of the aforementioned instructions.

So we had a couple options we might pursue in order to acheive this end. We could read the enclosed, step-by-step instructions or we could try and figure out how to assemble her desk ourselves. Thinking we were a couple of bright university students, we chose the latter.

2 hours later, we re-visited our starting point and chose the former. And within 25 minutes, her desk was up and running..


I'm often told that the faith that I ascribe to is a long list of rules. I'm told it's restrictive. I'm told it's an assault on my freedom.
Interesting, I say.

But I do disagree.

I don't think it's rules. I think it just makes sense.

In the assembly of furniture, if the instructions are neglected, you end up with a consumer newly acquainted with their purchase, bumbling around trying to create something that maybe they've seen a couple times on display in the store.
To me, this makes little sense when, included in the package, are detailed instructions on how the product is best assembled. Intuitively, it makes sense that if the designer has included directions, they will provide the path of least resistance to the desired end.

I think the same holds true when we talk about the purportedly restrictive rules the Church has ever espoused. The Church has no hidden agenda - she gains very little from the obedience of her congregation. More often that not, her teachings result in persecution rather than pleasure. And yet she continues to espouse them.

Because they make sense.

See, if I believe that I have been uniquely crafted by God, and if I also believe that He has not only created me, but also set before me guidelines within which to live my life (communicted through His Church), then I naturally I think it logical to follow them - or at the very least, to give them the time of day. So quickly today the teachings of the Church are easily dismissed on the basis of being old-fashioned, or just because they depart from the norm of society today. But before they can be dismissed, I think they need to be tested.

In my 22 years of life, I've lived a life in line with the Church's teachings, and I've lived a life that rejects her instruction. And I say without hesitation that the former has brought me exceedingly more joy, peace and warmth-in-my-soul satisfaction than the latter.

And this really shouldn't come as much of a surprise.

The One who has created us, and placed in our hearts a deep desire for happiness, for real joy, knows what it is that will fill us. Our God has not rejected the superfluous pleasures of society so that we would lead lives of misery. It is such the opposite. He has seen how they tease the spirit. He has seen the brokeness that's left when they're gone. He knows the high they provide - but He also knows the depth of the residual low.

And He demands better for His beloved.

So we're called to a life pursuant of everlasting joy. The road map has been set before us by the Church. It isn't meant to oppress us, and it certainly isn't meant to lead us through lives of misery. The Church espouses a life of freedom. It encourages a self-discipline that allows the human person to take control of their own lives, to be free from the slavery of our passions; discerning that, when we experience this freedom, we will find great joy.

As a human family, we are all walking this life looking for happiness. We can either bumble our way around and hope to one day end up there - or we can recognize the treasure of the Church's teachings and jump on the express train.

Muscles of love

Everyone has muscle. You’re born with it. You develop it as you grow from an infant to a toddler and a toddler to a teen. But everyone has a different muscle mass. And to a large extent, the amount of muscle we have is based on the choices we make and the lifestyle we live.

I had a friend go in to the hospital for surgery last year. Her stay ended up being extended due to some complications that landed her bedridden in the ICU for a couple days. She recovered fully (praise God) and when we were later talking about her experience, one of the first things she mentioned was how her strength was significantly altered when she left the hospital. See, if we don’t use our muscles, if we lie in bed all day long – whether by choice or by circumstance – our body thinks it a waste to divert a larger than necessary amount of oxygen and nutrients to muscles we aren’t using. And so they begin to shrink , to atrophy, and we lose some of our visible muscle mass and functional strength.

The opposite, of course, happens when we exercise. When stress is placed on your muscles, they break down. And then tomorrow, they are re-built to be stronger than they were originally. And the more you stress them, the bigger and stronger they become. It’s not an irreversible process though, and so, when you take an extended break from whatever form of resistance training you may have been doing, your muscles will lose some of their acquired strength.

The efficiency of the body!

I think our capacity to love is much like the strength of a muscle.

We have choices in our love. We can choose to just love when it’s convenient. To offer a smile or a helping hand when it’s easy. But that’s a pretty superficial, self-serving kind of love. It doesn’t challenge our natural inclinations. It doesn’t cost us anything. It puts no strain on our heart. And so our ability to love doesn’t get stronger. Nope, I think that as we accustom ourselves to love in this way, we begin to teach our heart a pattern. And our ability to love sort of shrivels up.

I think the opposite happens too. There are people in this world who choose to love sacrificially on a daily basis. And it brings them great joy. They are constantly rebelling against the natural inclinations of their fallen flesh. They give up their own desires that they might fulfill the needs of another. They challenge their seemingly feeble selves, until one day they are no more the frail heart they once were. They are constantly breaking down their weak muscle, only to find it stronger the next day. And so, just as over time, we can go from lifting 10lbs to lifting 30lbs – so too, with time and use, our capacity to love is expanded.

When John Paul II was shot – he was able to go with peace and forgive the man who wanted him dead. Did he receive that grace overnight? Unlikely.
I’m more inclined to believe it was his lifetime of selfless service to his flock and the whole world that prepared him.

We won’t all be shot. But we will all find ourselves in situations where our ability to love is challenged. And I think we will only be able to respond generously if that has been the practice of our daily lives. Whether in friendships, relationships or family ties – it is our mandate to love. A la 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.